Tuesday, March 31, 2009
today is 31st march, and blogging off at 19:37 upon my return home.
today, we have pe consisted a game of ultimate frisbee, ok, maybe two games. winning percentage = 50%, and joshua is good, really good at hitting things off people's possessions. :D
today, i had my co interview for the pending and yet-to-be-decided entry to becoming an exco member again. and
today, i feel insecured for the 1st time in vj.
i didn present my very best to the interviewers today, but i was definitely truthful, or at least a can swear a 99% credible.
their faces were really scary - nice people becoming beasts longing for us to satisfy their thirst of cannibalism.
just something about myself to everyone who dont know me that well..
i LOVE cip, it's something that's inside my blood - i take joy and content from the activity itself and at the same time deriving inspirations and reflections from it and on it...
it's supernova camp 3 years ago when i collected newspaper with the campers for charity - proceeds to SPD. i was super high whilst the collection and am really proud of myself being able to relate to people within the building - irregardless of skin-tones - and being able to gather colossal kilograms of newspapers for charity.
i was damn proud and satisfied with myself - i'd never felt that way before sec 2.
and since then, cip is something i devote myself to. i dont do it for the hours, i do it for the recipient and i do it for myself.
and i was super disappointed in the 4r1 people when we collected newspaper for cip last year.
people, even close friends, dont find it worth doing and are shying from knocking of doors to receive donations...
i was to a certain extent pissed then, and when i ranted to koknam - if i remember correctly it was him - people started to change and do the right things the right way.
and i will be joining the nkf youth group something this year, but after my syf coz i dont wanna join without contribution and devotion - thats why i say i cannot participate in project winnie coz i know i cant devote time in it.
and i desire respect, it's ok if you dont appreciate but please respect.
i went tearing over respect issues in many junctures in my life..
it's something that is important to me.
and i cry alot. alot for a guy.
i can go all emo suddenly and dont talk for a day to anyone at all.
and sometimes i can go all wirey and jump and scream lik crazy.
and i dont like myself, period.
before today, i've never known that we cannot play card games in vj - coz i see people playing in vj, in concourse and in treehouse before. wow, lets go treehouse to play next time, i think it's damn cool there.
i need friends, i want friends, desperately forever.
it's the most important subject in life ever.
i want to be nice to everyone who deem fits for me to, and if i sound offensive or am having inappropriate attitudes towards you, please let me know - i will change, definitely.
i am qihao who demands respect and friendship, and i dont like myself.
that's a summary of this post, and yep, byes.
i am not particularly happy posting anyways.